In Glock We Trust

23 Apr

I found an interesting item in the Washington Post the other day. It seems some Christians in northern Virginia don’t really expect their god to keep them safe, even when they’re in church. So, they’re helping him out.

By bringing weapons to church.

Here are some excerpts from the article:

Parishioners carried Bibles in embroidered cases, babies with ribbons in their hair, and flutes, violins and sheet music into Immanuel Bible Church for Palm Sunday services.

And a few carried guns, tucked into waistbands, hidden under suit jackets.

– snip –

Philip Van Cleave, of the Virginia Citizens Defense League, said people have been carrying concealed weapons to church for years because of the threat of terrorism and church shootings across the country.

“Al-Qaeda has been our reason, as well as many of the recent church shootings around the country,” he said. “Think of it this way: If saving your own life isn’t a ‘good and sufficient reason’ to carry a gun, then what else could possibly qualify?”

– snip –

“Guns in a church? Why?” said Samy Youssef, a member from Alexandria. “God is our protector. He is our savior.”

– snip –

“The real sad thing for all of us in this is it’s an indication of where our culture is — that public meeting areas, churches, schools, town halls, malls are threats for terrorism,” Holley said. Two years ago, he said, a preacher in Illinois was gunned down in the pulpit.

The Rev. Tom Joyce, a fellow Immanuel pastor, said there was a case in Colorado in which a gunman began spraying bullets in a church but was shot and killed by someone in attendance.

“We rely 100 percent, before any weapon, in the power of the Holy Spirit to protect us,” he said. “It’s also good to have some people here on campus” who are trained and armed.

It seems to me that, if the Holy Spirit’s protection needs to be supplemented by firearms, then faith in him is not 100%, as claimed. Samy Youssef (quoted above) agrees with me. Apparently, the gun-toting Bible-thumpers who disagree with Samy and me are more inclined to believe that their god helps those who help themselves than to believe that he looks after his own.

— the chaplain


Posted by on April 23, 2011 in religion, society


23 responses to “In Glock We Trust

  1. Ric

    April 23, 2011 at 4:57 pm

    Just what the country needs: more delusional ignoramuses carrying guns.

    • the chaplain

      April 23, 2011 at 5:07 pm

      As usual, the true depth of most religiobots “faith” comes out in a crunch. Most Christians pray for divine healing – and go to board-certified doctors. Now, some Christians pray for divine protection – and pack heat.

  2. Tommykey

    April 23, 2011 at 5:35 pm

    Odd, because the only incidents that come to mind for me are Dr. Tiller getting assassinated in his church and the attack on the Unitarian Universalist Church. Seems to me the ones getting attacked in their houses of worship are liberals.

    • the chaplain

      April 23, 2011 at 6:13 pm

      I remember those two shootings. I also remember the Colorado shooting referenced in the article. Here’s a blurb:

      The gunman believed to have killed four people in a pair of shooting sprees at a megachurch in Colorado Springs and a missionary training school near Denver had been thrown out of the missionary school a few years ago and had been sending it hate mail, police said in court papers Monday.

      The gunman was identified as Matthew Murray, 24, who was home-schooled in what a friend said was a deeply religious Christian household….

      Looks like one of their own turned on them.

  3. The Wise Fool

    April 24, 2011 at 12:32 am

    Gee, if I was truly saved and truly loved Jesus, I would think that I would welcome an early mortal demise to more-quickly spend eternity with my favorite supernatural being…

  4. Frank DN

    April 24, 2011 at 8:25 am

    Silly atheists! Everyone knows the only reason to pack heat in church is to shakedown the faithful – er – um – I mean collect the tithes from the cheerful givers. Pay up or get smited.
    A while back they were claiming these gun toting morons were part of a specially trained security force operating with the pastor’s full knowledge. That sounded like even more BS than my take on it.

  5. the chaplain

    April 24, 2011 at 9:28 am

    Wise Fool:
    Evangelicals sing,

    When we all get to heaven, what a day of rejoicing that will be;
    When we all see Jesus, we’ll sing and shout the victory.

    But they balk when they get a chance to hasten that glorious day. Curious, no?

    It’s getting increasingly difficult to distinguish between the various godfathers – the church guys wearing stiff collars and the criminal guys wearing tailored suits.

  6. PhillyChief

    April 24, 2011 at 9:33 am

    Sort of an extreme version of why have lightning rods on the roof of a church, right?

    So we have lack of faith, ignoring the whole “turn the other cheek” thing plus the live as an example sentiment, then of course the “thou shalt not kill” commandment (that one always gets forgotten somehow, unless the topic is abortion), and the “He works in mysterious ways/all part of God’s plan” thing that always gets paraded out after tragedies denied. I mean, how is God supposed to get his point across without the occasional martyr tragedy? He might even have one of those clever plans in place where everyone but one person dies, so that the survivor can be on tv showing how God saved him, proving he both exists and is loving.

    Maybe I’m oblivious to the news, but somehow I don’t remember hearing of people being attacked in churches that often, and I don’t believe any church has been attacked by Al Qaeda nor even threatened by them, have they? The rationales for the guns, on all fronts, seems pretty shaky.

  7. Tommykey

    April 24, 2011 at 10:14 am

    Of course they have to bring their guns to church with them. Just in case that Kenyan Muslim Nazi Atheist Barack Obama sends his health care police force and his union thugs after them while they’re in church.

  8. the chaplain

    April 24, 2011 at 5:40 pm

    Consistency and logicality have never been Christianity’s fortes.

    You left out “Communist.”

    • Tommykey

      April 25, 2011 at 12:48 pm

      Damn! Knew I was forgetting something!

      • the chaplain

        April 25, 2011 at 5:21 pm

        My excuse for occasional forgetfulness is being a female of a certain age. What’s your excuse?

  9. desertscope

    April 24, 2011 at 10:01 pm

    God helps those who help themselves by busting a cap in someone’s ass.

    “We rely 100 percent, before any weapon, in the power of the Holy Spirit to protect us,”

    Is “Holy Spirit” a euphemism for the sacramental fortified wine?

    • the chaplain

      April 25, 2011 at 5:18 pm

      Hmm. Spiritus Sanctus sounds like a cheap wine, in approximately the same category as Boone’s Farm.

  10. Ric

    April 25, 2011 at 7:03 am

    “We rely 100 percent, before any weapon, in the power of the Holy Spirit to protect us,”

    So they’re saying the HS doesn’t protect them, because if it did then they wouldn’t need guns ever. Guns work, god doesn’t?

    • the chaplain

      April 25, 2011 at 5:19 pm

      Guns work, god doesn’t?

      You’re catching on!

  11. Moe

    April 25, 2011 at 10:00 am

    Where did the good Christian wives carry their ‘pieces’?

    • the chaplain

      April 25, 2011 at 5:15 pm

      “Good Christian wives” depend on the menfolk to protect them, just as the good lord intended. :roll:

      • Ahab

        April 25, 2011 at 11:53 pm

        There’s something more than a little macho about carrying guns to church. I’m wondering if this is about asserting a certain kind of masculinity as much as it is about protection.

        • desertscope

          April 28, 2011 at 11:51 pm

          I imagine concealed weapons must be strapped on the body somehow. Wouldn’t it be great if concealed weapons were referred to as “strap-ons?” The right-wing kooks/white supremacists who brag of their “concealed carry” permits might not be as proud of their “strap-on” permits.

  12. Lorena

    April 28, 2011 at 4:43 pm

    Once again it becomes obvious that Christians are not only afraid of hell. They’er also afraid of earthquakes, tornadoes, hungers, home break-ins, assaults, and what not?

    The greatest thing about having left the faith is having left the fear behind. Like I told my mother the other day, ” I prefer to have faith that the neighbours will take care of my house.”

  13. Sarge

    April 29, 2011 at 6:58 am

    The cognitive disconnect, and “cafeteria” christianity is what I see in evidence.

    Their deity is “almighty”, yet, I’m told it needs “protected”.

    They spurn the “beatitudes” and embrace the OT and the Jesus who comes with a sword. None of this “do good to those who hate you” fol de rol. They all know what happens when you try that.

    Their christianity is on the model of Charlemagne, really, and their scripture is the one that Jenkins and LeHaye expounded in “Left Behind”.

    I hear “them” talking, and if they ever get their nerve worked up and they come to demonstrate thier christian love, if you aren’t packing yourself you better have sound wind, good legs, and a long head start.

  14. After the Pulpit

    May 2, 2011 at 1:57 pm

    Get out while the gettin’s good! Another reason to step out of the pulpit–those people I’m pissing off in the pews are packing heat! Geez! Thanks for this post. Now, I’m off to buy a bullet-proof vest to wear under my alb.


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