I came across some interesting odds and ends this past week. The first is a church sign that, in the light of numerous scandals involving clergy abuse of parishioners, takes on a sinister meaning:
Sinister Sign
The second item reminded me of Mark Twain’s observation that
Man is the religious animal. He is the only religious animal. He is the only animal that has the True Religion –- several of them. He is the only animal that loves his neighbor as himself and cuts his throat, if his theology isn’t straight. He has made a graveyard of the globe in trying his honest best to smooth his brother’s path to happiness and heaven.
With that in mind, I was amused by this look at how bugs, if they had religion, might worship their savior:
Everyone Worships the Same God
Finally, an action figure I’ve just got to have:
God: New & Improved, Armed & Dangerous
That explains why so many Christians are gun nuts.
(sung to the tune of “Gimme that Old Time Religion”):
Gimme that AK-47,
Gimme that AK-47,
Gimme that AK-47,
It’s good enough for me.If it’s good enough for YHWH,
If it’s good enough for YHWH
If it’s good enough for YHWH
It’s good enough for me.
– the chaplain
Temaskian
June 26, 2010 at 12:05 pm
Funny!
Larry Wallberg
June 26, 2010 at 2:29 pm
I’m trying to sing that song, but I keep getting stopped in mid-stanza by YHWH.
Is that pronounced Yahoo! If so, is it in the Swiftian sense. Or can it be an homage to all second-rate rivals of a competing god, the Mighty Google. Perhaps it’s just a rebel yell in the Glorious Tradition of the South™.
Maybe you think I’m kidding. Well, I quote from the Wikipedia article on the tetragrammaton:
Frankly, I think the ancient Jews pronounced it OyVey.
the chaplain
June 26, 2010 at 2:34 pm
Well, I was going to use “Jehovah” but it didn’t fit the meter at all. Don’t worry, I won’t be quitting my day job to start writing TV jingles.
Mark
June 26, 2010 at 3:07 pm
The church sign that says “God created me for his pleasure” makes their God look like a guy that loves S & M.
the chaplain
June 26, 2010 at 3:16 pm
The Abrahamic god is a sadistic sucker. Judging by the number of people who follow Abrahamic religions, he apparently doesn’t have any trouble finding masochistic partners.
seantheblogonaut
June 27, 2010 at 1:46 am
Please tell me the action figure is a joke
the chaplain
June 30, 2010 at 2:58 pm
I’m not sure, but I think it is.
Cephus
June 27, 2010 at 2:10 pm
Hah, that’s great. I’d love to have one of those God action figures, complete with AK-47. Now you’ve given me something to look for!
desertscope
June 27, 2010 at 9:55 pm
Forgetting for a moment, Jehovah’s 70s sci-fi cape and Clockwork Orange codpiece, how is it that whoever made that action figure (presumably China) can’t identify an AK-47?
desertscope
June 27, 2010 at 9:59 pm
I am reminded of the wisdom of Homer Simpson:
Lorena
June 28, 2010 at 5:20 am
Interestingly enough, when I step on a bug in the backyard, I often think that I’m “god” to the community of unsuspecting critters.
Everyday I become further convinced that there is no god, not in the biblical sense neither in any other. But, there could be other forces out there–existing, not controlling us.
hippieprof
June 28, 2010 at 11:29 am
I am reminded of a college prank my roommate and I perpetrated.
He was adept at picking locks, and late on Saturday night we would go to the Baptist church across the street from the college, pick our way into the sermon sign, and rearrange the letters.
My favorite is when we changed “Christian Living in a Sex Saturated Society” to “Sex in a Christian Saturated Society”
Eventually they got a better lock…..
desertscope
June 30, 2010 at 6:33 pm
God created mefor his pleasure.
God created me
ribbed for his pleasure.
Fixed it.