One of last week’s more bizarre news stories was the destruction by lightning of the huge Touchdown Jesus statue that dominated a church campus in Cincinnati.
As other bloggers have pointed out, this event puts Christians who interpret natural events as signs of a supernatural being’s approval or displeasure in an awkward position. Was the lightning strike an act of god’s judgment, his seal of disapproval? The church affected doesn’t seem to think so, as the congregation intends to rebuild the statue. This time it will be fireproof.
Another, seemingly unrelated, story occurred just a few days before lightning struck: a federal court upheld a ban on ten commandments displays in two Kentucky courthouses.
Ho-hum. Another ten commandments case. That’s hardly news.
Unless one finds a connection between Touchdown Jesus and the ten commandments:
Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image.
If that’s the case, then it should be obvious to Christians that Touchdown Jesus had to go and he has to stay down. No rising from the dead ashes for this Jesus.
On the other hand, maybe the lightning strike was just an example of, as the Good Book says, god sending rain on the just and the unjust. Shit happens, and it can happen to anyone, because god pisses on (and electrocutes) everyone equally.
Or, maybe it was just a random natural event.
– the chaplain
John Purcell
June 20, 2010 at 12:17 pm
I wonder if the church had any insurance on Touchdown Jesus? Purchasing insurance would indicate a certain lack of faith, now wouldn’t it?
Spanish Inquisitor
June 20, 2010 at 12:29 pm
Love the new post-modern look Chappie. Very edgy.
desertscope
June 20, 2010 at 3:19 pm
They don’t go out of their way to obey any of the other commandments, so why worry about graven images?
the chaplain
June 20, 2010 at 5:10 pm
John:
That’s never stopped churches before.
SI:
Thanks for the compliment.
des:
Did you see that statue? Talk about butt-ugly! This is one occasion on which god can be excused for taking action to defend his honor.
Mark
June 20, 2010 at 5:20 pm
Christians just love graven images…crosses, Virgin Marys, crucifixes and many more items. It’s amazing how they ignore this commandment, but they’re always ready to use Old Testament ammo against gays(Leviticus), evolutionists(Genesis) and atheists(Psalms).
the chaplain
June 20, 2010 at 7:52 pm
Mark:
Christians are cherry pickers par excellence.
PhillyChief
June 20, 2010 at 10:39 pm
I’ll never understand that whole nonsense of how religious things won’t be religious if grouped with secular things, like how creches are ok as long as there’s a Rudolph and Frosty. Name me any other violation of the law which is ok if surrounded by legal activity. The whole thing is absurd.
As for fireproofing the new Touchdown Jesus, do they think that will thwart their god? Will they make it safe from plagues of locusts as well? He’ll destroy the new one too, somehow, right after he saves the Gulf from oil, or helps his favorite team win the World Cup. Speaking of which, he clearly doesn’t love America. How else do you explain how that third goal got taken away?
the chaplain
June 20, 2010 at 10:55 pm
Philly:
I can't. The whole "it's not religious if we put some non-religious shit alongside it" ploy is not merely absurd, it's disgustingly dishonest. You and I, and most of the readers who come here, know that the whole point of ten commandments plaques, graduation prayers and similar antics is to create the illusion of Christian Nationhood. It's bullshit and it can never be given a pass.
ildi
June 23, 2010 at 7:30 am
In related news, PETA has offered to rebuild Big Butter Jesus:
Ah, the delicious smell of burnt irony in the morning! It is an aroma most pleasing to the Lord! (almost as pleasing as burnt flesh…)
PhillyChief
June 23, 2010 at 8:45 am
Oh my, that’s deliciously ironic and absurd, from the “Jesus would be horrified”, since he allegedly ate fish and lamb (and since he is also his daddy and daddy loves bbq), to the “that statue is not to promote any agenda” line. Priceless. When nutters collide!
the chaplain
June 23, 2010 at 8:52 am
Bzzzzzzzzz. Wrong answer. We can’t all agree that Jesus even existed, let alone that he did this or that, or would “be horrified” at this or that. Having said that, as Philly noted, biblical evidence indicates that Jesus, the Divine Dad and the Holy Ghost really loves ‘em some barbecue – if he/they ever existed.
Spanish Inquisitor
June 23, 2010 at 5:47 pm
MMMMmmmm. Lamb stew.
the chaplain
June 23, 2010 at 5:50 pm
Does it mean anything that Jesus is often called the Lamb of God?